Saturday, July 19, 2014

K-Town Saturday Ramblings





I recently came across a book called MWF seeking BFF: My Yearlong Search for a New Best Friend. It’s about the author, Rachel, who moves to Chicago to be with her boyfriend after living long distance for a while. Shortly after they get married, she realizes that her new life is missing one thing: friends. She has friends all over the country, but there’s no one local she can call at the last minute for girl talk over brunch or have a reality-TV marathon over a bottle of wine with. So she makes a plan to go on 52 friend dates, 1 a week for an entire year, hoping she’ll find her Best Friend Forever.  Thanks to www.goodreads.com for that snippet.

So this obviously resonated with me. I think everyday how much I love my life but LITREALLY the only thing that would make it better is if my besties lived nearby, or if I just had someone I could call any time of day to get together. While you’ll have to read the book to find out what happens, one thing I got out of it was to say ‘yes’. When you’re invited out or given the opportunity to do … well, anything that will potentially allow you to meet new people, you should say yes.

I consider myself an outgoing enough person, but it’s hard to say yes to things that bring me out of my confront zone or things I know I’m going in completely alone. Although, I think it’s a good lesson; and I think that if I keep doing that… saying ‘yes’, eventually it won’t be out of my confront zone, it’ll just be something I do. Plus, if I make a really good friend out of it… even better!

I’ve said yes to brunch tomorrow morning with some ladies from the Women’s Club, a garden party in August (wtf is that?) and to a potluck organized by expats tomorrow afternoon. I also said yes to a theatre event last night.

I was supposed to go with one of the ladies I really like from the Women’s Club, but she was busy. She suggested I go with her au pair. It ended up being really great. Her au pair is a beautiful Spanish girl. She doesn’t speak much German, so we both just looked at each other most of the play like “you getting this?” After the play we went downtown to meet up with some of her friends and have a few drinks.

One thing this girl Rachel’s book didn’t cover is international, multi-lingual friends….

***

So remember those old puzzles where you were given hypothetical information about each person and then had to use a spreadsheet to figure out which person belonged to each profession… or whatever. (Tell me the name of this puzzle and you will get a postcard.)

So here’s my version of that puzzle. These are all the people that were having drinks together last night. You have to figure out who the American is that should’ve learned German a year ago, and maybe she would have more friends…

Person A speaks Spanish fluently, English moderately and German beginner
Person B speaks English only
Person C speaks German and Spanish fluently and English moderately
Person D speaks German and Spanish fluently and English not at all
Person E speaks English and German fluently
Person F speaks English and Spanish fluently

If you didn’t get it… B is the American and B is me. After I finished stumbling my why through a few forced, awkward conversations, I excused myself because the infants (average age 21) were going clubbing.

While she doesn’t talk about making friends abroad, Rachel does discuss the importance of being at the same level. She went on a few friend dates with women just out of college. She also went on a few friend dates with women in their 40’s with teenage children. These didn’t work out because she wasn’t on the same lifestyle level with them. (She used a way more professional, scientific word… but you get what I’m saying).

So while the 21-year-old Spanish/Germans probably won’t be my besties, I feel glad that I put myself out there and feel more confident to put myself into future potential friend making situations.


1 comment:

  1. Gosh I totally need to read this book! Hard to breakout out of my comfort zone and meet new people!

    ReplyDelete

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